I think my journal entry on 5 April 2011 is worth sharing, especially with moms and dads whose little ones--ages 3 to 5, perhaps--are losing appetite. This I believe is a breakthrough story on how we, the parents, managed to get our daughter to eat her meals and snacks without having to deal with unpleasant struggles with her.
Our daughter, Tina, is now 4 years, 5 months, and a few days old.
Hunger in Africa: A breakthrough, I hope
I and Chris had trouble getting Tina to eat her regular meals and snacks. She abruptly lost her strong appetite for every dish and food that she used to like. She’d begin her day with a whimper that would progress into a full blown crying in anticipation of or while enduring a regular meal or snack. This had become Tina’s routine everyday before breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner. Also, she now hates to drink milk. It’s been a messy battle of will and tricks between us three for around seven to eight weeks. And she's been losing weight.
3 April 2011, 2 days ago, I wanted to write about how, once again, I believe, I had gotten into the mind of Tina. But I was afraid that my strategy would be only good for only one day just like my inflated-deflated plastic trick to get Tina to eat her meals. One afternoon, I was watching youtube videos while Tina was playing when an idea came to mind. I typed “hunger Africa” on the youtube searchbox. When the video played, a touching music came along with photographs of extremely emaciated African children. I called Tina to watch the video. She sat on my lap and I started talking about how lucky she is that she has food on the table, that she has Mommy and Daddy to help her finish her food, and so on. I told her I don’t understand why she has to cry each time she sits on the table to eat her meal when other children cry because they have nothing to eat. This seems to be working quite effectively. The following day, Tina made weak attempts to refuse to eat, but she would suddenly stop crying and resume eating when I bring up the youtube picture of a vulture waiting for a starving kid to die. Probably, Tina finds this horrifying that she would eat again when told that the vulture is out to get hungry children. Now its easy again to get Tina to drink her milk. I hope this is a real breakthrough. It’s been two days and Tina would finish everything that we put on her plate.
Secretariat and being number one: Freedom
Tina has been crazy about horses since she was 1 year and 6 months old. I think this started in a horse farm we visited in Indiana.
I’d been looking for a CD or DVD copy of the latest Seabiscuit film but I just can’t find one. About a month ago, I stumbled on Secretariat instead. It’s a story of a great champion horse that run in the 70's. Tina likes the race and the idea that Secretariat is a number one horse. I’d been drilling into Tina the final race where Secretariat started ahead and ended up too far ahead of her lone and strongest rival horse. I tell her that being number one like that means not eating dirt and soiling your face. Tina would always say, in response to my question whether she wants to eat dirt and soil her face, that she wants to be ahead and have a clean face. I say that being number one in her case is doing your best in school as she is no horse. I asked her if her classmates could already do addition, subtraction, and patterns. She said no, so I told her, at this point she is ahead of them, hence she is number one like Secretariat. I’d ask her then if she wants to be number one, she says she wants.
I’m looking for a shirt with number one on it and a number one pin.
I want to drill into Tina's head that being number one means many opportunities and many options. That is a higher freedom that she and everyone should pursue. It means freedom from pressure of having to make the right decision in the midst of very limited options. I hope my daughter will come to appreciate this point someday.
It’s been a better time for the three of us now that Tina had seen faces of hunger in Africa and Secretariat the champion horse. Both are currently the most powerful reinforcers for Tina.
Tonight, too, Tina had done a good job with one- and two-digit plus and one-digit minus. Tina too has improved significantly with her ability to see patterns.
I was happy this morning that Tina came to me and asked me how to read the name "Knopf,” which is the name of the author of the book she was reading. I’d now think that Tina is possessed by a different soul if Tina will not open and read at least one children’s book in one day. Reading is now built in to Tina. She just loves it. She reads children’s books everywhere inside and outside the house. She brings and reads a book in the car, in the bank, anywhere we take her. Even on the toilet seat. When I say she reads, she really reads. Also, I had a pad of papers and a pencil ready in our toilet as there are times when Tina would prefer to write her name than to read while pooping.
Tina has now mastered fastening her own car seatbelt. She has been doing this for many months, maybe seven. I'll go check in my past journal entries.
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